


Misunderstand

by moonbya



Series: Haikyuu!! Rare pair Week 2020 [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Akaashi Keiji (Mentioned) - Freeform, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Bottom Tsukishima Kei, Cafe owner Tsukishima Kei, Drunk Sex, Exes, Fake/Pretend Relationship, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Just tipsy actually, Kiyoko my queen im sorry, Kozume Kenma (mentioned) - Freeform, Kunimi Akira (mentioned) - Freeform, M/M, Minor Character(s), Not Beta Read, Not Proofread, POV Tsukishima Kei, Pining, Sad, Shimizu Kiyoko (minor) - Freeform, Slightly nsfw maybe, Terushima Yuuji is oblivious, Terushima ghosts Tsukishima, Top Terushima Yuuji, Tsukishima Kei-centric, Tsukki im sorry, Tsukki suffers, Yamaguchi Tadashi (minor) - Freeform, a lot of unnecessary words, cringy sex scene ngl, fluff?, i rambled a lot in this lmao im sorry, idk what else to tag, idk what i wrote lmao pls enjoy this mess uwu, not detailed sex scene; i will use other words for it bc im shy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-04-27
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:35:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23877775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonbya/pseuds/moonbya
Summary: The past three days Kei spent with Yuuji was both emotionally exhausting and challenging, despite the fact that all they've done is take pictures so Yuuji could post it on his social media accounts and him staying until closing hours so he could cry and pour all his pain on Kei's shoulder.Kei doesn't mind it, really.  He wasn't embarrassed when Yuuji was snapping 'candid' pictures of him, he wasn't even a little happy of the whispered praises he receives when the pictures turns out good. He wasn't upset at the sight of Yuuji smiling and crying at the picture on his phone that was definitely not Kei. He didn't offer his handkerchief so Yuuji can wipe his tears and blow his runny nose. He didn't rub his back in attempt to comfort him when he cried a little too much. Except, he did; all of it.But it's fine. Even though for the past three days he felt like his heart was riding a roller coaster. He's felt butterflies swarm his stomach. He's felt his heartstrings pull and snap.But it's fine, because it's for Yuuji. It's fine because it's Terushima Yuuji.
Relationships: Terushima Yuuji/Tsukishima Kei
Series: Haikyuu!! Rare pair Week 2020 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1720675
Comments: 3
Kudos: 36





	Misunderstand

**Author's Note:**

> HAIKYUU RARE PAIR WEEK 2020 DAY 1: Coffee shop, Fake dating au 
> 
> (but not really...)
> 
> ...
> 
> Hello! This is my first FIC fic and the first time I join an event, and so far, I'm so stressed ahaha. Anyways, forgive me if there are any grammatical errors, English isn't my first language. Please enjoy this TeruTsuki, join me in hell lmao 
> 
> Feedback are appreciated, thank you for your time!

In just a blink of an eye, the scorching heat and humid breeze of summer has made a quite remarkable impression this year. Everything is just too hot; the sunshine, the tap water, the wind, the concrete, literally every object under the glare of the unforgiving sun, Kei's temper and Terushima Yuuji.

To say that Kei despises the summer is a complete understatement.

And until now it's still a wonder to him how and why did he allowed himself to stay after working hours, he's had his partners leave an hour early and insists he'd close by himself (earning a series of 'hooray' from the quadruple) just so he can talk to his regular who practically _begged_ for him to stay and talk.

Minutes passed and wasted, and Kei isn't exactly patient. The slow jazz softly playing in the background and the continuous fidgeting, avoiding of eye contact and mumbling of incoherent words is driving Kei so close to losing his composure.

"Are you done thinking and panicking all by yourself? Should I leave you alone so you can think better, Terushima-san?" Kei questions, voice dripping with sarcasm and eyes sharp enough to make Yuuji flinch in his seat across from him. "I don't have all day, so speak up, I'm already tired."

Yuuji chuckles, nervous and forced, and started his seemingly practiced speech with a shaky sigh. "Please pretend to be my boyfriend." His head was low, to the point that his forehead is touching the table, ears red from embarrassment and the only thing that came to Kei's mind was: what the fuck?

Today was hot. Everything feels red to the touch, burning and melting. Time is fast paced and moves in a blur, loud chatters and heavy footsteps. And suddenly, silence. Oddly enough, in this exact time and place, in the middle of summer, Kei felt cold— ice cold. As if he was out in a snow storm with nothing but a shirt and shorts. Kei felt cold, to the point he couldn't feel his body as if he's frozen solid. So cold that his jaw tightens and teeth clatter, shoulders tensing up and his lungs burns from the lack of oxygen— until it doesn't anymore. As if summer itself planted a kiss on his ears that sprouted to his cheeks and down to his neck, spreading warmth and comfort and hope that maybe, maybe, finally this is his chance—

"Are you serious? I'll pretend we didn't have this conversation, Terushima-san. Kindly leave, I still have to clean some things." Right before Kei could even rise from his seat, a hand found its way to grasp so tightly on his wrist. Honey eyes moved to meet dark chocolates ones, glassy and pleading as if Kei was the only hope he could hold on. His ears felt like summer and his heart throbbed at the broken state Yuuji was in. "Please, wait. Tsuki-kun, listen to me first. You're my only hope, so please. Sit down and hear me out."

Kei complies without much thought, Yuuji's hand immediately retreating, leaving his skin warm and tingling. Then, Kei notices. Like he always do. He notices the red at the corner of Yuuji's glossy eyes— at the edge of letting a tear fall down, his dark blonde locks unusually messy, gel free and his lips quivering. Kei could feel his heart break a little, the usual ball of confidence and joy now looking like he just got his life wrecked— got his heart broken into hundreds and thousands.

With a small nod, Yuuji began to speak and Kei did his best to keep his eyes in contact with eyes and not stray to his forehead or nose. Only because, seeing the person you love of two long years, on the verge of breaking down, isn't a pretty sight to look at. He's scared that he couldn't control himself and wrap his arms around Yuuji, play with his hair, kiss his tears away and whisper that he's not alone, that Kei will do everything he can to make him feel less broken, even just for a little.

"Kiyoko broke up with me last night."

Kei's eyes grew wide with surprise, his body unmoving and thoughts languid. A part of him was sad, for Yuuji and her was his very first customers, yet there's also this part of him that he's so embarrassed of, that he hopes the ground would split open and eat him alive, torture him because he was actually feeling happy.

Happy but he knows it's wrong to feel and wrong to hope that he stands a chance. He's wrong for thinking that maybe this is the universe telling him that maybe, just maybe, Yuuji and him are actually meant for each other. And Kei hates himself for thinking that way.

Yuuji explains and Kei hears, but not entirely listening because his feelings are a little too loud, his heart is racing a little too fast yet his mind was at a red light.

"Please just until she returns back to me. We just have to be together at a place where she is at, post each other on social media— "

"That sounds like forever to me. What if she doesn't come back? Don't you think this is too much to ask from me?" _It's okay; we can be wherever and do whatever you want. I don't care if I benefit from this or not, but please run into my arms when she pushes you away_. Kei leaned back on his seat and crossed his arms across his chest, he wanted to provoke him— to push him into saying that they might have a chance and give it a shot.

But Yuuji's discouraged and glum expression made Kei bite on his tongue and regret his decision. "I... I don't know... Tsuki-kun, I don't know what I'd do without her..."

Kei's heart cracked. Yuuji's voice was wavering, face hidden by his palms. He looks so small and fragile, and Kei couldn't handle seeing the person he loves suffer like this. Kei sighed and ran his slender fingers through his wavy, blond hair. Even though he'll be the loser at the end, even though he'll destroy his own heart— as long as Yuuji will be whole and happy again, he doesn't mind.

So he agrees. Tsukishima Kei agreed to a contract that'll break his own heart. "Okay, let's do it, Terushima-san... Or should I call you Yuuji?"

-

The past three days Kei spent with Yuuji was both emotionally exhausting and challenging, despite the fact that all they've done is take pictures so Yuuji could post it on his social media accounts and him staying until closing hours so he could cry and pour all his pain on Kei's shoulder.

Kei doesn't mind it, really. He wasn't embarrassed when Yuuji was snapping 'candid' pictures of him, he wasn't even a little happy of the whispered praises he receives when the pictures turns out good. He wasn't upset at the sight of Yuuji smiling and crying at the picture on his phone that was definitely not Kei. He didn't offer his handkerchief so Yuuji can wipe his tears and blow his runny nose. He didn't rub his back in attempt to comfort him when he cried a little too much. Except, he did; all of it.

But it's fine. Even though for the past three days he felt like his heart was riding a rollercoaster. He's felt butterflies swarm his stomach. He's felt his heartstrings pull and snap.

But it's fine, because it's for Yuuji. It's fine because _it's_ Terushima Yuuji.

-

Tsukishima Kei has always hated the summer. He hated waiting. And it's truly a wonder how he managed to be stuck between the two. He stood under a tree as a protection from the harsh glares of the sun, looking around with his headphones on, and has been waiting for twenty minutes too long. Today is the first time Kei and Yuuji will pretend in front of Kiyoko herself. Apparently, his friends decided to meet up with their partners, and because she was there too, of course Yuuji just have to bring Kei along too.

To say that he isn't feeling a little happy is a total lie. And Kei despises himself for that.

"Kei! Have you waited long?" Yuuji came into his view looking so handsome, so out of his reach. Kei pulled off his headphones and looked away, scowling; his cheeks were as hot as the sun, he needed to hide it from him. "Too long I almost thought I got stood up, but then I realized I wasn't dating anyone."

Yuuji's laughter was music to his ears, he sounded like his favorite ballad and Kei couldn't help but look at him and just feel himself drown to Yuuji's song. The more they talk, the more Kei forgets he was supposed to be upset, the more he forgets they were supposed to pretend, the more he forgets the promises he told himself last night that he shouldn't get too close and attached to Yuuji, but here he is right now, sitting next to him and his five friends in an unfamiliar cafe with Yuuji's hand on his thigh.

His chest tightens, he feels terrible for enjoying this, displaying affection in front of his friends— especially to Kiyoko. Kei couldn't bring himself to meet her eyes, he's afraid that he'll feel wrong and guilty until he regrets and break off the game, but then Yuuji squeezes his knee gently.

Just like that, Kei has forgotten what he was worried about.

They talked and laughed, yet Kei only hears quiet chatters, unable to decipher the conversation. He feels so out of place, his eyes were stuck on the iced coffee he's drinking from a metal straw provided by the shop.

How long has they been here? Kei seems to lose track of time, has it been minutes? Hours? His languid thoughts were pulled to a full stop when a hand took his and intertwined their fingers together. "Babe, you feeling okay? You're a little quiet today." Yuuji questions, voice low and sweet as honey. His face was at such a close proximity to Kei's profile, he could feel his hot breath against his skin, giving him goosebumps and his nose gently nudging his cheek.

Muscles tensing, spine abruptly straightening, stomach filled with a kaleidoscope of butterflies and cheeks flushed a pretty color. Kei bites his lip, even when he wasn't looking, he could feel the ablaze stare from Kiyoko.

Kei swallowed the lump in his throat and turned to Yuuji, pressing his forehead against his with his eyes closed and giving the hand laced against his a reassuring squeeze. "Yeah, I'm okay, don't worry about me."

The moment he opened his eyes, he was welcomed with dark chocolate hues staring back at him intensely. Pupils blown wide, soft-looking lips parted slightly and cheeks burning pink. Kei's breath hitched in his throat, heart seeming to reach a flat line and drop to the floor, and for the first time in his whole life, Kei wanted to _misunderstand_. Time seemed to freeze, as if no one else existed but them. For the first time, Kei wishes and hoped for the impossible to happen.

But then, everything breaks and crumbles to dust when Kiyoko suddenly stood up and left. The very eyes that were once looking only at him now following the disappearing figure of the person he actually loves. Yuuji was wearing an expression he couldn't understand, his lips were smiling yet it didn't reach his eyes, Kei swore he could hear Yuuji's heart weep.

And Kei dies a little inside. But it's fine, this is fine, everything's fine. Because this means their plan is working, right? The earlier they return to each other, the less it will hurt right? The faster he'd be able to move on, right? ~~Right.~~

Still, he watches with envy written in his eyes, mind, heart— every part of him— he breathes and sees with green. If he walked out, will Yuuji look at him the same way he looked at her? Kei could only smile at himself so bitterly.

He went home alone; disappointment weighing him down, yet it _is_ his fault for expecting Yuuji to accompany him. Kei laid on his bed, lights off and wrapped with multiple blankets in hopes it'll soothe the ache in his heart. He stared at the darkness, mind occupied by the man he unfortunately loves. His touch, the look in his eyes when he looks at him, his scent, how his cheeks bloomed like cherry blossoms when there was barely any distance between their faces.

The event just keeps on playing and playing in his brain like a broken record. His fists clenched tightly and pulled the blankets closer to his body, exhaling and closing his eyes, only to be haunted by the expression Yuuji wore when Kiyoko left. Those eyes that held so much longing and love for someone will never look at him the same. Kei squeezed his eyes tighter, trembling hands lifting to cover his ears from the loud voices in his head.

Voices that screamed how unwanted he is, how undesirable, small and insignificant he is. He's unlovable, undeserving, unworthy, pathetic, aloof, sarcastic, rude, inconsiderate, intolerant, obstinate, unpredictable, impatient, ugly, lanky—

_Ding!_

Then everything stopped. Kei took a sharp inhale of air and took his phone lying right next to him. He unlocked his phone and frowns at the sender of the message:

_From: Terushima-san_

_Thanks for coming today! I hope you'll have a good sleep, good night!_

Like a miracle just occurred, Kei felt serene. He smiles as he reads the text over and over and over until he believed that he cares, that Yuuji cares. And to Kei, it means the world. He felt like he matters. Now, he's fine. Everything is fine. And Yuuji is the summer he would tolerate.

-

Kei spent his nights with barely any sleep, and there he realized the one who caused the voices in his head appear, is also the one who silenced them.

A sigh escaped his lips while he watched the roasting process of their coffee beans. "Tsukki!" Kei snapped out of his trance when fingers were way too close to his face, snapping continuously. "Huh?" He turned to see Tadashi frowning at him with both hands resting on his hips.

"The roast ended five minutes ago. Are you okay?" Tadashi says softly, audible enough only for Kei to hear. He stiffens, facial features scrunching into a confused expression. He was spacing out for too long and he didn't even realize, "Ah.. Yeah, I'm fine." Kei chuckles forcefully, rubbing the back of his neck as he turned to face his childhood best friend. 

Tadashi shakes his head, concern written all over his face. "Doesn't look like you're okay to me. C'mon Tsukki, you can't lie to me, you know that. Tell me what's wrong, we're all worried about you." he tilted his head to the side and Kei's eyes followed to see Kenma, Akaashi and Kunimi not too far from them. And in these moments, Kei feels like he's loved. There are people who still cares for him, that there are people willing to pull him out of the dark. But no.

He can't. He couldn't bring himself to speak of his mess, he couldn't escape this darkness and he'd rather keep his friends protected under the light, without any shades of his shadows. "I'm... Okay, really. You don't have to worry about me," Kei smiles painfully, not daring to meet Tadashi's observing eyes. Knuckles turning white at how his fists are, nails digging crescents onto his palms and it still hurts less from his heart dropping upon hearing the disappointment in Tadashi's voice.

"You know it's fine to tell us, right? You shouldn't shoulder it on your own. Tsukki, we're your friends! You can trust us." Kei couldn't imagine the face he's making right now that made Tadashi slap his shoulders and grip on it tightly. His breath shakes, "We all have problems, Tadashi. Mine is nothing to worry about." He said, with every control he could muster so his voice won't waver and his eyes won't show how his heart is handling his situation.

Tadashi frowns and Kei got the feeling that he knows. Tadashi knows but he wanted it to be confirmed by his own words. He can't. He can't acknowledge the feeling or else he'd fall deeper, once that happens, who knows how he'll handle the pain. "I understand. But please remember we are here to listen and help you if you want. Come to us when things aren't bearable anymore. Okay, Tsukki?"

"Okay..." Kei exhaled deeply once Tadashi was out of his sight. He just keeps on running away, just an endless cycle of him regretting yet still finding himself running back to the person who's ruining him.

Speaking of the devil, Yuuji later came in looking as breathtaking as ever, looking like he could tame Kei's demons that he, himself, created. "Hey, Kei," Before he could even realize it, Yuuji was standing in front of him, leaning on the counter and smirking at him, with less than a meter distance. "Yes, hello. Shall I get your usual?" Kei spoke, voice as monotone as he could.

With a single gesture, Yuuji broke his walls with just a simple smile. "Yup! You know me so well, Tsukki! Add a blueberry waffle—"

"—With extra whip cream. Of course."

Yuuji gasped audibly and broke into the biggest grin and Kei unconsciously smiled back though small and barely there, his heart was doing all the smiling for himself. "WOAH are you a mind reader or something? This is crazy, it's like you can read my mind! Try again, read my mind right now, quick!" Kei finds it so endearing how he gets so giddy over the cool 'tricks' he's been showing him for the past week.

"I'm thinking that it's about time you pay for your order." Kei snickers at how Yuuji's smile immediately dropped, "That's not what I was thinking. You're no fun, Kei." He grumbles and slides the cash towards him, fingertips brushing against each other and Kei pretended like it didn't send electric tingles all over his body. "I'll call you, get your seat."

Kei watches his back get smaller as he walked away from him to sit on his favorite spot, eyes meeting and Yuuji flashing him his brightest smile, Kei rolled his eyes and turned his back, starting to prepare his order. Trying his best to ignore the burning feeling on his fingertips that brushed against Yuuji's, trying to suppress the voice in his head that whispers instead of scream, telling him how he has a chance, that Yuuji likes him back, how his smile is different today, how the touch was on purpose. And Kei wanted to believe— he was a millimeter from falling into the sea of his hopes until he sees Yuuji and Kiyoko speaking in a hushed argument.

And there goes all his hope and dreams, crushed at the very sight of them together. His grip tightens at the tray and sent glares at their direction.

Today, the sun is at its highest peak and hottest temperature, so how come Kei feels like his body is made of ice. He stood there frozen and unmoving, yet the next thing he knows he's placed the tray with Yuuji's food on their table. A blank expression worn on his face as he turned to Kiyoko, "May I know what your order is? Or are you just here to bother my boyfriend?"

Boyfriend, huh. It rolled out of his tongue as is it was the truth, but it pained him. To say that word, especially when Yuujj and him are far to be on that label, is a pill too difficult to swallow.

"Boyfriend? Bold of you to say that word despite not being in an actual relationship." Kiyoko answered back eyeing Kei from head to toe and felt his skin crawl at the gesture. "What's this? You're still in denial that Yuuji moved on from you? Bitter that I'm the one he loves and not you?"

Every word he spilled felt like he was swallowing poison and shards of glass. He felt dreadful for taking advantage of the situation to make himself feel less inferior, feed his ego and make himself believe that what he's speaking is the truth.

Before Kei could run his mouth again, Yuuji called out his name, a little too loud for his quiet and humble cafe, but he still finds comfort in his voice. The moment he felt his wrist was hugged with Yuuji's hand and tugged him down, everything suddenly feels so slow.

He turned his head to look at Yuuji, eyes widening as the inches between them cut shorter into centimeters. Clouds of breath started to mingle and lips gently brushing against each other ever so gently before pressing into each other, lips locking into a perfect fit like a jigsaw puzzle.

It took Kei a second or two before he could understand the situation. Yuuji is kissing him. Terushima Yuuji, his unrequited love of two years is kissing him.

Kei wanted to cry, to get mad and throw a fit. Mad at himself for feeling flowers bloom and fireworks erupt in his insides. He isn't supposed to enjoy this — this kiss wasn't even truly meant for him, so why is he finding himself melting into the kiss and cupped Yuuji's face with his free hand to deepen the kiss.

In the back of his head, he knows this is all an act. Still, he buried that thought deep enough so he couldn't remember, and purposely misunderstand instead.

Lips moving in perfect sync, as if they truly belong to each other. Kei felt like floating in cloud 9 with every contact that feels so, so comforting.

The kiss felt like summer, his lips feel hot and Kei is burning. He'd rather burn if it means he could keep kissing the man he longed for so long. Yet, why does it feel like he's finally whole again? As if the pieces Yuuji took from his has returned— as if he was built back up again, as if all pain he suffered the past week has magically vanished into thin air.

Their lips lingered for a few mere moments before Yuuji broke off the kiss, and Kei immediately misses the warmth and soft feeling of his lips. His eyes remained closed, still feeling so euphoric from the kiss that swept him off his feet and fall into the endless feelings he has for Yuuji. He expects to see the same chocolate eyes staring at him so intensely, with blown pupils and red cheeks.

But Kei was met with disappointment.

He opened his eyes in hope to meet Yuuji's but they never came. Their eyes never meet. For Yuuji's attention, that he craved, was directed to the door where Kiyoko was leaving. He holds that same hurt and longing in his eyes and Kei almost broke down in tears upon witnessing the same thing over and over.

What he thought he was whole again after just one kiss was stupid. That Yuuji will magically fall in love with him with just one kiss will remain a fantasy.

Again, Kei is back into pieces. He was never really whole. He bites his lip, trying to hide the hurt in his features. Yuuji didn't even apologized, didn't even spared him a glance, and Kei curses himself for expecting too much. Cursing for disappointing himself. He turned to his heels and walked away, fighting every fibre of his being that screamed at him to cry and run back to the man that destroys him.

Home is where comfort is. It's funny how it applies to Kei in this situation, it was always the same after all, he'd go home as fast as he could because things are starting to get worse, things are becoming a lot more unbearable, Yuuji is becoming more unpredictable and he hates it.

His room was quiet and dark, and Kei prefers it like this. Each step felt so heavy; gravity pulling him down closer to earth as it crumbles beneath his feet. Kei let his bag drop next to his bed and allowed himself to fall on his back. Darkness stared back at his honey eyes and it didn't take him a minute to break down. His chest tightens and liquid pain flowed out of his tear ducts, he could only let out quiet whimpers and choked out sobs— the voices are just so loud he could barely talk back.

Kei pulled off his glasses and set it on the floor, taking whatever his hand could grab to hug and curl up, clinging onto it as if it was his last drop of sanity. All he thought the kiss actually means something, that he might actually turn this pretend relationship work into something real was naive of him.

Silently, he weeps yet his body was loud, trembling and hurting yet feeling so numb at the same time. The same question ruling the chaos in his mind, "Why don't you ever look at me like that?"

-

The next three days was hell. Yuuji suddenly disappeared without any trace. And Kei handles it pretty well, he thinks.

"You look horrible. Did something happen?"

"Huh?"

Kei blinked, seeing Tadashi next to him with his hands placed firmly on his hips and felt a huge wave of déjà vu washed all over him. "I always look like this, Tadashi." He sighed and returned his attention into pouring the espresso to the iced water. "You know what I mean, Tsukki. You've been quiet about it for days and each day you're looking worse."

He went to the counter and called the customer's name, the iced Americano on his hand. "Don't ignore me, Tsukki—"

"Kei." He froze at the familiar voice that called out his name ever so softly; his skin crawled and turned to meet the same dark chocolate eyes he loves. "Yuuji... Ah, Tadashi, can you please leave us for a bit?" Kei bites his lip, eyes never leaving Yuuji. He didn't even hear if Tadashi replied or simply walked away from them.

"Are... You free today?" Yuuji then spoke up after a trail of silence between them, and Kei wanted to be mad— three days of ghosting and he'll just expect him to just agree?

Kei frowns, "As in now?" But of course, he'll agree. He'd be lying to himself if he said his heart isn't soaring with joy right now. "Yeah. Let's go somewhere. This pretending is working its magic, y'know? Kiyoko and I are texting each other a little more often now."

Ah, right. He got happy for no reason again, his heart cracked and felt another piece fall down and turn into dust. "Cool. Wait for me, I'll just change my clothes."

Kei quickly told his friends that he'll leave early for today and left even quicker before they could question him.

-

"I swear this amount of plushies is unnecessary, Yuuji."

"I disagree, we need more."

"I'm literally carrying _fifteen._ "

"And your point is?"

"My arms hurt, I don't deserve this. I'm tired." 

Yuuji turns to finally look at him, away from the claw machine, "But you look cute right now," he snickers, nose scrunching up adorably, before bringing back his attention at the machine; completely focused. And boy, did Kei regret his whining— attacking him with cuteness then strong sex appeal is just too much for his poor, bruised heart to handle. His cheeks were kissed by summer, surprisingly, Kei liked it. There are times, he would push his luck by trying to touch Yuuji as much as he can; light, lingering touches until Yuuji just full on held his hand in public and Kei felt like he could die in that time and place, he was beyond euphoric. Warmth spreads all over and Kei doesn’t mind. He doesn’t mind summer holding onto his winter self, as long as it was Yuuji, it’s more than okay.

After hours upon hours of taking pictures in every photo booth they run into with, and has tried every street food stall, Kei was finally home with two huge bags of plushies, uncountable photo cards and take outs. For the first time in two weeks, happy hormones filled his entire being—he finally felt happy. Yet it was short lived, Terushima Yuuji disappeared without any trace for a whole week, or so.

And Kei felt nothing but despair that whole week. Sleepless nights spent with tears as he caressed the plushies he won for him, the photo cards from at least seven photo booths and the candid pictures shot on his phone. Kei mourns for his heart.

Nine days turned into twelve, fourteen, twenty… Still none.

Every night he regrets and blames himself for this. If only he didn’t pushed his luck, if only he didn’t took advantage of the time Yuuji held his hand, if only he wasn’t too happy that day then maybe he wasn’t left alone like this once again, if only he didn’t allow his feelings to take over. Kei has done nothing but repent, over thinks, over analyzes of what he should’ve done that day that might have given him a different, more happy ending and hates himself for loving Yuuji, for loving the wrong person, for loving the man who is his hopes and dreams, the man who destroys his hopes and dreams; his mind was just filled with him, just Yuuji this, Yuuji that, YuujiYuujiYuujiYuu— and oh.

Yuuji is calling.

Kei answered faster than light itself.

_“Hello..? Kei? Are you home right now?”_

_“I am. It’s two in the morning why did you call?”_

_“Can I come over?”_

_“Huh? R-right now? Why?”_

_“Please Kei.”_

_“Okay. I’ll send you my address.”_

_“Thank you, let’s drink tonight. My treat.”_

Kei stares at his phone after sending Yuuji, dumbfounded. After three weeks of ghosting, Yuuji just enters his life like it was no big deal— as if he _knows_ that he will be welcomed by Kei anytime; and he is right.

As much as Yuuji is his greatest weakness, it doesn’t changes the fact that he is also his source of strength. Kei sighs loudly before forcing himself to tidy up his room and get a quick shower. From what seemed like hours later, his doorbell rang and Kei leaped out of his bed in a hurry.

There Yuuji stood wearing a lazy grin as he showed a bag of alcoholic drinks and some food as well. "Hey, it’s been a while."

"Indeed. Come in."

Bottles of sake and cans of beer have flooded their small circle around a coffee table set up in the middle of Kei’s room. _It’s a shame he didn’t bring any kahlua, but I guess this is fine too_ , Kei glances at Yuuji who’s staring into space, head buzzing a little at the amount of alcohol now being absorbed by his body. They have been quiet for way too long, and Kei couldn’t handle the silence anymore— he needed answers.

"Yuuji. Where were you? You’re always gone without any trace or contact, were you hiding from me?" He spoke, cheeks red from the alcohol and scooted a little closer to him, shoulders barely touching but he could still feel his body heat nevertheless. "Why? Did you missed me?" Yuuji grins before taking another gulp from his beer.

Kei kept his mouth shut, biting his tongue as if it could control himself. He felt a sense of relief when Yuuji began speaking again, glad that he didn’t pushed the question on him.

"Kiyoko and I… Are well, back to being friends again, I guess. But honestly, I think that’s better than nothing."

"Oh." Kei chuckles bitterly and took his half empty beer and finished it in one go, trying to drown his breaking heart. "That’s good. So, I guess we’ll stop?"

Yuuji looks at him as if he’s gone mad; Kei raised his brow at him. "No. Not yet. So please tolerate me a little longer, Kei. Yeah?". Slowly, Kei’s slender fingers slides next to Yuuji’s, gently tracing the shape and held a finger caressing. "You really love her, don’t you?"

He was answered with silence, when he lifts his gaze from their hands, he was greeted by that same intense gaze from before and Kei’s heart skipped a beat. “Why aren’t you answering me?” He repeated his question and still silence from Yuuji.

"Why are you suddenly so quiet?" Their locked gaze was broke off when Yuuji’s eyes trailed lower to where his lips are. Kei subconsciously bites his lower lip, "I’m starting to misunderstand this, Yuuji."

Yuuji leans in and presses a ghostly kiss on Kei’s lips. "What-what was that for?" This time, the blush on his cheeks wasn’t caused by the alcohol anymore. And Yuuji’s next words made him lose control.

"Then, keep on misunderstanding, Kei."

In a heartbeat, Kei crashed his lips against Yuuji’s, lips moving in sync at a steady rhythm. He felt a hand wrap around his waist, gently tugging him closer, and Kei didn’t need to be told twice. He moved to straddle Yuuji’s lap without unlocking their lips. Warm hands sneaked beneath his shirt and roamed each dip and curve of his torso, while he wrapped his arms around Yuuji’s neck and pulled him closer for a deeper kiss. Tongue slides on his lower lip and Kei slacked his jaw to meet Yuuji’s pierced tongue, rubbing and suckling.

Kei moans softly against the kiss, mind clouded by lust and alcohol. "Wanna do it, Kei?"

_“Yes. Please.”_

The once silent bedroom was now filled with moans and sin. Clothes disregarded randomly at the floor; Kei laid on his bed, completely exposed as Yuuji left red bruises all over his body, teeth leaving dents and tongue leaving a trail of fire. Hands clawing and clutching on the sheets as Yuuji familiarizes himself with every inch of Kei. His back arched beautifully at each stroke, toes curling as the speed increases; the high driving close suddenly came to a full halt and Kei couldn’t help himself but whimper at the loss of contact.

Digits slicked with lube gently presses in, making his breath tremble until Yuuji adds more and more, thrusting, curling and pressing into a certain spot that sent electrifying pleasures all over his body, stretching him just well enough with three. _“Yuuji, hurry.”_ Kei pleads, body growing hotter and patience running shorter by each second.

Yuuji chuckles and took the square packet and tears it open with his teeth, giving himself a few strokes before rolling it down. He lined himself, drizzled a little more lubricant to make sure Kei is in comfort, before pushing himself in and breaks the tight ring of muscle, intruding something wet and so intimate.

Summer spreading through their body like wildfire, layers of sweat rained on their temple, loud moans and groans from each fluid movement. Kei was a mess, his glasses crooked yet not bothering to take it off, eyes trained on the man on top of him, _“Don’t hide your face from me, Yuuji.”_ He chanted his name, as if he was praising some god. Yuuji leans down as they shared another passionate kiss, pulling each other closer as they danced.

The rush of high came once he fell from his climax, leaving liquid white all over his torso. Yuuji followed soon, filling the condom with his load, body lingering together as they catch up their breath.

Kei trembles and reaches out to cup Yuuji’s face, running his thumbs across his red cheeks. He looked so beautiful Kei could almost cry, he almost confessed but instead he pulls in for another kiss; this time chaste and languid. Savoring and memorizing the shape of his lips, how they tasted and how good it feels to dance against his.

The next thing Kei knew, he woke up alone in his bed, with nothing but the marks of yesterday. Yuuji once again left, and this time, he took Kei’s heart along. Tears flowed out of honey eyes; things didn’t change for good and Yuuji was gone longer.

Two months. It took eight weeks before Kei could catch the man who stole his heart. Terushima Yuuji came back to his café and invited him for a small talk, and who was Kei to decline. "Long time no see, Terushima-san. I suppose you’re together again?"

"No."

"You were gone longer. If you two weren’t together, why didn’t you contact me back?" Kei questions, hands turning into fists under the table. Today, the summer fled and was exchanged with the calm autumn, but Kei is nowhere near calm; his emotions are all over the place he wanted to scream it all out but whenever he looks in those dark chocolate eyes, serenity washes over him, reminding him everything is going to be alright.

"We should stop pretending, Kei."

Five words created a chaos in Kei’s mind, "W-what? Yuuji, what do you mean?" there’s this little fire in him that told him that he has won the war in his mind, that maybe this time, Yuuji will run back into his arms. "I don’t understand."

But instead of voicing out his answer, Yuuji’s eyes grew soft as he looks at Kei, fragile yet sincere. And once again, Kei fell.

"Yuuji, you’re making me want to misunderstand you again."

With pink cheeks, Yuuji smiles at Kei.


End file.
